UnReal Recap

Coleman Wasserman has just joined the Everlasting team and is now in charge, much to the dismay of Rachel, Quinn, and Chet. Rachel and Quinn have even more reason to be upset; Coleman has decided to retool the show to fit Chet’s “Everblasting” concept.

Blechh. Even the name screams “douche.”

As Chet organizes the first “Everblasting” date, Quinn decides that the only way to make the network see how valuable she is will be to deliver mega ratings. She introduces herself to MMA Fighter Brandi and the two bond over their tough childhoods. Quinn encourages Brandi to be aggressive as she goes after Darius and to stop making friends with the other contestants. Rachel and Coleman listen in from the control room and Rachel explains to the skeptical Coleman how easily people can be manipulated for drama. She asks if Coleman’s girlfriend watches the show and he ends up revealing the details of their tragic break-up.

“Hey, Coleman?” Rachel interrupts. “That’s how this show is made.”

It’s time for the “Everblasting” date! Chet originally wanted the contestants to ride ATVs and blow up explosions in the background but Darius’s manager Romeo immediately nixes it, explaining that Darius cannot afford to injure himself off the field. Reluctantly, Chet changes the date to be an America Ninja Warrior obstacle course for the women to race through for a one-on-one date with Darius.

As the contestants prep for the obstacle course, the producers work their dark magic. Jay convinces Ruby to put a little more effort into being more feminine, Quinn turns Chantal against Brandi, and Madison gets Beth Ann to say more racist things on camera. “I’m not supposed to tell you this, but your Twitter has blown up…You’re like Donald Trump with boobs,” she tells Beth Ann, who gets excited at the prospect of infamy.

Reality Reveal No. 1: Why aren’t contestants allowed access to the Internet and social media  while they are on a show? Can’t the producers just sue if they reveal too much?

TV Juriste Response: I’ve never worked on a show that prohibited participants from using the Internet. I can’t say it doesn’t happen; but, I’ve never seen it. All shows prohibit reality show participants from disclosing confidential information on social media. 

The obstacle course begins and Brandi, Chantal, Tiffany, and some random girl are the first up. Brandi and Chantal are neck and neck and as they climb up the final wall, Brandi grabs Chantal’s foot to knock her down. Chantal falls straight down, hits her head. and is knocked out.

Reality Reveal No. 2: How much trouble would the show be if a contestant got seriously injured?

TV Juriste Response: Productions with these types of contests would/should engage safety experts to make these events as safe as possible. Participants who agree to take part in potentially dangerous activities usually are asked to sign agreements assuming the risk of harm and waiving their rights to sue. But, if a production is grossly negligent, serious liability could result no matter what they signed.  Bottom line: TV producers try to keep participants safe. 

Quinn orders Brandi to be isolated in “the hole,” a small room sequestered from everyone else, while Chantal is prepped for a “get well” visit from Darius. Coleman asks what is going on. “And now we go in for the kill,” explains Rachel. Quinn asks for Chet to be sidelined for the day so she can work her plan and Coleman agrees, much to Chet’s dismay. Chet also gets more bad news from his lawyer: the judge refuses to let him have custody of his son.

Oh man, this is just going to fuel his MRA rant on Reddit later.

Darius visits Chantal, who pretends to be demure. “I didn’t want you to see me like this,” she says. Yeah, I’m sure you were embarrassed to be seen in a silk nightgown with a fresh blowout by your crush. Anyway, she and Darius flirt and kiss.

“True love: they can find it here,” Quinn brags to Coleman. “Or we can make it.”

As Chantal recovers, the rest of the contestants dress up for a cocktail party at the mansion. Ruby borrows a dress from Hot Rachel and tries to get alone time with Darius but Beth Ann interrupts. The two get into another argument about Beth Ann’s racism and Ruby storms off. Jay catches Ruby and reminds her that if she really likes Darius, she needs to stop picking fights. “Stop lashing out and start thinking,” he tells her,

Meanwhile, Quinn visits Brandi in the hole and lies that Chantal has a concussion. Brandi breaks down and admits that her foster care upbringing makes her needlessly aggressive. Quinn tells Brandi that she should confess her past to Darius on their one on one date to win back his and the other girls’ sympathy.

Hey, concussion or no concussion, Brandi technically did win the obstacle course and the date. Would that ever happen on The Bachelor?

Brandi reveals her abusive foster care past to Darius and like Quinn predicted, he becomes sympathetic and forgives Brandi. He even kisses her too! Quinn obnoxiously cheers for her own success in the control room.

However, after the date is when Quinn goes for the kill. She introduces Darius to a woman claiming to Brandi’s mother. The woman explains that Brandi lies about a tragic upbringing for attention. Angry, Darius calls out Brandi at the elimination ceremony and points out that her mother is on set to counteract her lies. Brandi insists that she did grow up in foster care and hysterical, she tackles Darius as he walks away from her.

As security escorts Brandi away, Coleman asks if the woman really is Brandi’s mother.

“Central casting, baby,” Quinn explains.

Reality Reveal No. 3: Can the show really cast actors to pretend to be a contestant’s family members? Isn’t that fraud?

TV Juriste Response: Fraud is such a strong word, Susan. 😀 Participants usually are asked to agree that producers can “fictionalize” aspects of the show and the show’s depiction of the participant. 

As the camera get set up, Darius has a noticeable back injury. Romeo and Chet quickly accuse Quinn of ruining Darius’s image but Quinn brushes them off and assures that everything will be fine. After she leaves, Chet tries to convince the guys to go back to his place to party but Darius and Romeo explain that it’d be much easier to stay at the Everlasting mansion from now on. With all these rejections piling up in one day, it is sort of understandable that Chet would leave the set and break into his ex-wife’s house to creepily stare at his son.

Sort of.

Meanwhile, Coleman and Rachel flirt in the control room and she edits the day’s episode. He asks why she is on a cheap reality show when she clearly has talent for more. Rachel explains that she has the chance to make cultural changes on Everlasting and cites Darius’ casting as an example. Quinn calls Gary, the network exec, and brags about how she is the one who makes Everlasting possible. Unfortunately for her, the attempt to remind Gary of her value does not go as planned.

Gary shows up to the Everlasting set the next day in an expensive sports car and announces that he will be gifting the car to the person who makes Everlasting so great: Coleman. Obviously, Quinn seethes and demands to know why Gary won’t make her in charge again. Gary reveals that Rachel tattled about Quinn and Chet fighting and advises her to get her minions in line if she ever wants to rule again.

Rachel sees Gary and Quinn talking and immediately realizes that Gary has not kept her secret. She runs away and Coleman finds her in the control room, hurriedly grabbing her things and trying to find a way out of Quinn’s wrath. Coleman calms down Rachel and tells her that she is so much better than Quinn and shouldn’t be afraid of her. He also kisses her but their makeout session is interrupted when Romeo asks Rachel to see Darius.

“What’s going on?” asks Rachel as she goes to Darius’ room and sees him lying injured in bed.

“Shut the door,” he tells her.

Is that wise, Darius? When reality tv producers see you looking weak, we all know it’s a matter of time before they go in for the kill.


Mondays 10/9 central on Lifetime